Ephesians 4:25-32 Act Like a Christian
Since we have put on a “new self” created for us in the likeness of God that began with the renewing of our minds, we understand that we need to act like the people God is sanctifying us to be. Most of what Paul will instruct in these verses pertains to interpersonal interaction. What we say to others and how we act around them is vital. If we sound and act like everyone else in the world we may lose our ability to witness. If you lose your witness and people “tune you out” you can no longer function as representative for Jesus, or at least no longer to that person or group of people. Christian behavior is not something that should be turned off and on. Being a Christian is a 24 hour a day and 7 days a week existence, there is no time off!
Paul reminds us that as Christians we are held to a higher standard, of course if we fail we can receive forgiveness but we need to, with God’s help, remember that its not about us as we truly represent Him and should always accept and embrace His way. Many of these listed here by Paul reflect earlier teachings of Jesus and some all the way back to Exodus 20, the Ten Commandments. However, Paul not only lists those things that should not be done, he offers insight and what should be done as well.
We need to listen carefully to Paul and not just skim through this list of what may be considered by some people as minor sins or simple infractions. It is through these perceived, “lesser sins” that Christians have the most difficulty with and all too often the source of them stumbling through life and in their relationship with Jesus. God knows we struggle and we can’t successfully triumph over our issues without Him. James would remind us, “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.” (James 4:7-8, ESV) Plus it is also important to remember, there are no “lesser sins!”
25 Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. 26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and give no opportunity to the devil. 28 Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need. 29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
As Christians we are not to lie, misrepresent the truth or promote any form of deceit. We are not to live a, “double life,” by putting away any falsehood, we acknowledge the truth and reject all that is not true. The Apostle John would tell us, “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.” (1 John 1:8, ESV) We cannot live the life of a double agent, we would be only lying to ourselves.
Unfortunately telling lies have become common place and to some degree, often expected in our society. However, the Bible consistently tells us that speaking the truth is always important (read Zechariah 8:16; Colossians 3:9 and Ephesians 4:15), especially since we are always representing Jesus. If a lie is perceived by an unbeliever, they may doubt any message regarding salvation or anything about Jesus.
It is easy to see how verse 26 can be somewhat confusing with the phrase, “Be angry and do not sin.” Paul is not saying that we should be angry or not be angry but instead when we are angry, we should not hang on to that anger, as that will be a problem. Here are the same verses as rendered by the New Living Translation: "26 And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil." (Ephesians 4:26-27, NLT) Paul is saying if we get angry with someone we should reconcile with them the same day. Forgiveness is the key to reconciliation; even if someone seriously hurts us, we are not to remain angry.
Christians often ask what does it mean to forgive someone? Forgiveness is when someone is no longer angry, offended or resentful for some offense, flaw or mistake by another. God offers us complete forgiveness where He no longer remembers our sins (read Psalms 103:12 and Isaiah 43:25). Unfortunately, as human beings, we can often painfully remember and relive events requiring God’s love, comfort and strength for complete healing (see also Matthew 6:14-15 and Colossians 3:13).
Paul may surprise some by saying we need to watch what we give to the devil. In both phrases, “give no opportunity to the devil” or “anger gives a foothold to the devil” they point to how our attitudes can make us targets for the devil. Paul says unresolved anger gives the devil a place to hold onto in order to manipulate us (much like when a dog instinctively shakes their heads when holding to something in their mouths). That is why it is imperative that we resolve any issue that provokes anger as soon as possible.
Paul points out that whenever possible Christians are to make an honest living (see also 1 Thessalonians 4:11). We are not to steal but instead labor doing honest work. If our livelihood is from dishonest means we are not trusting God and our testimony could be questioned. If we don’t trust God now, how can we trust Him for our salvation?
In the same way, Paul tells us that we should not let any, “corrupting talk” come out of our mouths (see also Colossians 3:8 and Ephesians 5:4). Corrupting talk would include any words or discussion that could possibly demean another (regardless of intent), considered filthy or obscene, slanderous or words spoken in anger (even though freeways, driving and of course cars were not invented yet, this includes any road rage or angered words in our own vehicles!) Christians should always speak graciously (one that affords pleasure and joy), always encouraging and never foolish (see also Colossians 4:6 and Ecclesiastes 10:12).
Paul, in the middle of this list of interpersonal concerns seemingly changes the subject by saying that we should not grieve the Holy Spirit. The Spirit reminds us whenever we do something contrary to God’s Word. We know that God knows us well and knows what we are going to do long before we do it so how can we grieve the Spirit? The Spirit interacts with each of us differently, some might call it a guilty conscience or “that sinking feeling” when we say something or do something we know is wrong. Paul is not changing the subject midstream, as this is important for all Christians to know that even these perceived “lesser sins” are hurtful and should be avoided. Paul again reminds us that the Holy Spirit has sealed our hearts for the day of redemption (see Chapter 4).
Paul now, in rapid order, creates two lists, the first are those things we should put away (stop doing) followed by what we should embrace. The first list has six items that are all hateful in nature. As Christians, any presuppositions or preconceptions about other people from before we became Christians or any cause for hatred needs to be stopped (read Matthew 5:43-48), there simply is no room for hatred in a Christian’s heart.
Almost every story in the Bible illustrates some form of contrast, such as between God’s way and the world’s way, good versus evil, truth versus lies, light and dark and right versus wrong. One might even say that the entire Bible is a book of contrasts. Paul regularly employed contrasts, for example he listed several “works of the flesh” before describing the fruit of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:16-26). In a similar fashion, Paul tells us now in Ephesians to keep from grieving the Holy Spirit by avoiding six potentially destructive behaviors, namely, bitterness (handling someone harshly, a form of extreme wickedness), wrath (anger that boils over resulting in some form of destruction ), anger (indignation or loss of temper), clamor (outcry or loud complaint), slander (intentionally injurious speech) and malice (ill will with the desire to injure). Christians are to avoid all of these as they demonstrate the opposite of God’s love, they certainly do not set us apart from the world plus these are all contrary to the Word if God.
Paul then contrasts these with three attributes that Christians should embrace. They are kindness (taking the time to treat people favorably), tenderheartedness (demonstrate your care and compassion through love) and forgiveness (to let go of anger, pride and/or hurt forgetting anything that may have been done against you). These are all traits of Jesus that we should emulate. Showing favor, being compassionate and freely giving, would definitely set us apart from the world.
Paul once again reminds us to forgive just as Jesus forgave us (see also Matthew 6:12, 14-15; Mark 11:25; Luke 6:37; Colossians 3:13). Forgiveness is a central theme of Christianity and it is critical that all Christians practice what they preach and what was generously given to them. We need to remember that these passages also apply to our daily interactions with people including how we drive. Sometimes being “shielded” from hearing others or not being face-to-face as we travel we find it easier to be rude or impatient. We are always His ambassadors and even though we may never see the person who just cut you off in traffic again we represent Jesus and need to treat others on the road with kindness, compassion and certainly forgiveness!